Shirissa

I know this has nothing to do with my trip to Kenya, but this is a really pressing engagement on my heart which I feel is necessary to share. Shirissa Seibert was probably one of the most inspirational teenagers I'd ever met at Lakeside. I'd like to say it had nothing to do with her amazing talent God had given her that allowed her stand out amongst the hundreds of kids, but I know that'd be a lie. She wasn't just talented; she was sweet, tender hearted, motivated, beautiful, and so genuine. She was also only 19.

I think you've caught on by now from my numerous uses of the word "was" that God chose to take her home earlier than we all expected. I need to be honest here. I was sad and shocked when I found out on Thursday. I really was. But now... now I'm just devastated. I remember the last time I sat and talked to her... we were just sitting at Lakeside talking and hugging each other. She had her head leaning against me as I played with her hair. She spoke such sweet words of encouragement and appreciation for me when I was the one truly inspired by her. I have no doubt I shared my honest feelings back. But the point isn't just to relive my last moment with her, but it's important to gauge the depth of how we impact people we hardly know at all.

Lakeside is a very unique and amazing place where everyone are friends who love each other so deeply, and encourage each other so endlessly, and pass no judgment because we are ALL there by the grace of God. Therefore, Shirissa knowing nothing about me, my past, or what I was doing the following week, told me she loved me. Ran full force to jump and hug me after not speaking for an entire year. She loved me because I loved Jesus for the same reason she did, and we shared she a ground and true common denominator that NOTHING ELSE MATTERED BUT THE LOVE OF JESUS.

I'm sharing this, because everyone needs to understand something. What we do here has no lasting meaning or lasting matter without "the Who" we love and "the how" we love Him. That's it. That's the only thing that matters here. And when you figure out how to love Him, the rest of the living for Him and sharing of His goodness just follows along right behind it.

You don't need to be a certain age to impact a life. You don't. Any age is impacting- 6, 75, or just 19. You can do it just as you are. Just like Jesus calls us to come as we are, then He will use us as we are. Man! I wish there were a better way for me to explain what I'm trying to tell you!

I'm going to miss her! I'm going to miss not seeing her then next time I go back to counsel those kids. I'm going to miss her every time I hear Angel; more than I did before I knew I'd never hear her sing those words again...

It's still not real to me yet. But I know what is real... The love of Christ. That's it. And if that's the only thing I can trust will be remaining as I lay my head on the pillow tonight, and, Lord willing, as it rises tomorrow, then that is all I will need.

"Lord,
Please use these words... I can't speak what needs to be said without your inspiration first. God, let this increase in a passionate life of impacting others carry through, not only going and coming home from Kenya, but even more vibrantly after returning and the years ahead.
I love you. You are an amazing God, I cannot praise you enough. Thank you for your grace and patience in my life. Use me wherever I am. I am nothing without you."

.::Kenya's Calling::.